


The Pleasure of Being her Partner

by Shanynde



Category: Blue Bloods (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-08
Updated: 2015-12-08
Packaged: 2018-05-05 13:51:47
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,396
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5377604
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Shanynde/pseuds/Shanynde
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jamie muses about the way his life has gone and how he came to love his partner.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Pleasure of Being her Partner

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Raisintorte](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Raisintorte/gifts).



Some days Jamie allowed himself to ponder the path he had taken in life. Growing up, there was always a plan, expectations placed upon him and by him. He was the baby, he had 3 siblings to follow after. His Mom wanted law school, and fora while he did too. He saw himself successful, carving out his own legacy in the Reagan dynasty. His story would be different from Joe, from Erin and especially from Danny. His parents would be proud, he'd meet someone special and spend the rest of his life with her.

Losing his Mom and Joe was something that he would have never expected. He finished law school, but became a cop. He served the United States flag. He may have never been in the military, but he was serving his country in a different way. He had dignity and pride in his profession. 

Jamie thought he knew what being a cop was like. He knew there would be an endless litany of trauma, that it would be frustrating at times. He knew he would fight-with criminals, bureaucrats and other cops. He knew there would be little glory, dead bodies to identify, vomiting junkies, people he couldn't help and people he couldn't save. There would be piles of paperwork, gallons of coffee and cold sandwiches. There would be Kafkaesque bureaucratic snags, complex and heated arguments with Erin, Danny and his Dad. His family's love would never waiver even when the arguments rang them ragged. He would grow stronger, drawing on experiences to discover carefully hidden truths. He would be challenged, he would get discouraged, but being a cop was his calling and he embarrassed in wholeheartedly. 

Jamie could play the game as well as any other. He kept his head down and did the job required of him. He would clock in, finish his shift and make the right call when the moment presented itself. He wore the blue with pride and his morality and respect for the law was written on his heart.

There was one thing he hadn't prepared for, and it had crept on him so slowly he didn't realize it until it was too late. That thing was his beautiful and competitive partner. Eddie. Just thinking about her made him smile.

Danny respected and worked well with his partner; his Dad and Grandfather would reminisce about their friends and partners but Jamie figured that none of the men in his family had ever fallen into "something" with their partners. Not that it was just "something," but it was something that he couldn't...wouldn't say out loud.

Being the commissioner's son had granted Jamie privilege but it also caused some tension. Yes, Jamie might be put in situations that were difficult, but that was nothing compared to the scrutiny of some of his fellow officers. Many watched to see him fail or to use his character to draw conclusions about his father and brother. Jamie would always do what was right, even if it went against a superior's orders. He needed to do the right thing. And having "something" with Eddie was the wrong thing. If he did anything with her while they were partners, Jamie knew undoubtedly that he would lose the respect of everyone, including his family. Even worse than his fall from grace, he destroy hurt her. Eddie would lose the respect of everyone. And one thing he learned, once a woman lost respect, it was near impossible to get back. She deserved better than that. She deserved a man who would bring joy and pride into her life, not secrecy and shame.

Eddie was amazing. She was solid, stubborn and selfless. That didn't mean she was perfect. No, she had a temper, she was competitive and she always needed to have the last word. She was a pain in his ass, but she was also the highlight of his day. She was so simple, she was complicated, she was strong and she occupied his mind and he knew that she could occupy his heart and his bed, if he allowed that to happen.

His Mom had once said that love was a choice, and Jamie wasn't ready to choose to make a move. Yes, he loved her, he realized that, but that didn't mean he had to act. He wasn't going to allow himself to act on that or even think that. They were partners and he knew that they needed that partnership. Maybe one day it could be more, but Jamie would not risk it now; not while they were partners. She was his best friend, his other half. Whenever they finished a shift, they went out for drinks. She could drink a beer with the best of them. She would sometimes order a girly drink, like a lemon drop. Jamie didn't understand that. She had dragged him to a Russian speaking film and he watched her as she watched the film. He hoped she hadn't noticed. He knew her favorite food, her favorite flower and her favorite fight scene from Star Wars. Yes, it was pathetic but he was getting his PhD in Eddie.

Her kiss was amazing and she was stunning that night. Every once and while he would allow himself to imagine what if, the quiet dreams he could keep to himself. Imagine kissing her as they left the precinct, her in his bed, her sitting next to him at Sunday dinners. Danny and Erin already knew and respected her. Linda and his Grandpa would love her. She would come to Sean's soccer games and paint her fingernails with Nikki, or whatever it was that girls did together. His Dad would approve, and Edie would come to know him as Frank, not as the Commissioner. He would smile at her, and Edie would fill a spot that had never been filled in the home. They would joke and she wouldn't be afraid to engage in Reagan debates. She was unwavering in her beliefs, opinionated and would brighten the dining room with her smile and demeanor. 

He could go on forever about what moments were embedded into his brain and what lessons she taught him. She made him a better cop and a better man. She challenged him, defended him, made him laugh and offered unconditional friendship and respect. One day, he hoped she would offer her unconditional love to him. He would gladly give his in return.

"Jamie," he broke out of his train of thought to see the object of his thoughts and heart standing before him. Her blonde hair was up in a tightly coiffed bun. She looked so different when she was on shift. She was tough as nails on the job, and flirty and fun when shift was over. Even though she was small, she was fierce regardless of the environment. His partner wore a smile fit for a Renaissance painting. She held two c0ffee cups in her gloved hands and one had his name on it.

"Drink up buddy," she said as she shoved the coffee into his hands. "We have a long shift today. Can't have you falling asleep on the job," she teased.

"You're faith in me is astounding," he found himself retorting. "I'm not the one who fell asleep while doing paperwork."

"That was one time, and I was waiting for you to finish. Come on," she said smiling. "You're driving."

He allowed a small smile to pass his lips as he followed her. Yes, he couldn't be with her now, but they grew closer every day. She was it. And when the moment was right and they were both ready to make that step; it would end in a wedding, children and 50 more years of laughter and bickering. He wasn't ready for that, and he knew that she was not either. They needed to grow more. They would protect each other, both on and off shift. Jamie could control himself at the moment, content to wait. He knew that all he required was a sign from her that showed that she felt an inch of his feelings for him and wait for providence to provide an opportunity. It was going to happen, and Jamie was willing to wait. He was patient and in for the long hull. When the moment arrived, it would be worth the wait. Jamie was sure of that.


End file.
